"To do anything well requires knowing what it is that you're doing, and you can only know what you're really doing by making the process conscious reflecting on the task, and coming to a resolution."
Warren Bennis

It all began the summer of 1995 when I was brainstorming ideas for our Children's Service. I was to provide a service for a group of children ranging from five years to twelve years of age the first Sunday of every month with our focus being that of social action for kids. "Yes, we can make a difference" was our motto. I was also attempting to visualize in my mind intergenerational services and activities for the upcoming year; a concept that was novel to our fellowship with its new, but developing RE program.

It was when I put these two concepts together, social action for kids with intergenerational objectives that I came up with the Friendship Thanksgiving Feast idea. Children and adults working together to host a feast for the needy on Thanksgiving certainly had potential. Assuming that a small town like Bozeman, Montana had a needy population was an assumption that needed to be looked at closer. It was then that a co-committee was formed to take a close look at such details as to whom we should send invitations to.

Setting Sail-(But Where Shall We Go?)-The Fine Art of Making Decisions.

It was not hard to find volunteers from our small but committed fellowship to join in on the efforts of creating and designing a plan. The plan consisted of asking businesses as well as individuals from the community to donate the ingredients needed for a full blown, traditional Thanksgiving Feast. This meant thirty pounds of this and thirty pounds of that to seek out. No problem, the committee was on it. Second of all, we needed to research and identify exactly who the needy in Bozeman, Montana really were. The committee considered opening up the feast to all that showed up but decided that for our first time through we should keep it small in order to monitor it closely with regards to how much food we would need, the space allotment of a small Bistro (which by the way was a donation), the number of seatings and volunteers needed to work it. We also received feedback from the community that it was sometimes difficult to find the needy in Bozeman with a population of twenty-eight thousand. It was suggested that perhaps we should focus on a group other than the poor. It was decided that our focal group would be senior citizens who would not be spending time with family over the Thanksgiving holiday. We were thrilled with this decision because of the beauty found in the interaction between the young and the old. We knew we had fifty seats in the restaurant. Do we indeed have fifty senior citizens who would be interested in attending? Good ... someone's on it!

Our co-committee met a second time. Yes, it was a go-ahead. The senior centers and homes in the Bozeman area said that we would easily fill fifty seats! Later in the month it became clear to us that a commitment from many of our potential guests was hard. For example, weather conditions the day of health conditions, last minute invites were all variables effecting the actual turn out. We decided to publicize our event in the newspaper and open it up to all ages who needed companionship on Thanksgiving. Reservations were required.

Onto the actual day.

• Who would do what,
• do we want entertainment,
• can the senior citizens hear over music,
• how do we maneuver thirty children from station to station in order to provide hands on experiences for them,
• transportation for our guests,
• wheelchair access,
• special needs,
• food allergies,
• liability;

On the first Sunday of November the children met for Children's Service. With Thanksgiving right around the corner we began our service with the lighting of the chalice and giving thanks. Many children gave thanks for their moms, dads, brothers, sisters and grandparents. It was then that the concept of loneliness was brought to them. "Did you know that there are many people who might not be with anyone over the Thanksgiving Holiday?" Their eyes widened. "That perhaps our social action group of kids could do something to make a difference for these people."

It was then that the brainstorming process began. What could we do to provide a memorable experience for our guests on Thanksgiving Day? It was decided that the children would make invitations and deliver them, design party favors and table decorations, provide entertainment, help make the food, serve the food and most importantly provide friendship. The children's enthusiasm went home with them that Sunday. For the following Sunday the adults all signed up for their part in the Thanksgiving Feast. We were on a roll!!

On Thanksgiving Day we had children taking morning shifts to prepare the food. We had chefs in the kitchen racing the clock. We had adults arriving early to set tables and setup microphones. We had servers preparing their stations. We had children coordinators preparing for activities. We had story tellers and master of ceremonies preparing for their speeches. We had volunteer drivers picking up guests. And we had the homeless hearing about the feast at the last minute and calling to make reservations and yes, we had room! At 2:00 PM we had fifty guests arrive as well as our thirty children and forty adult helpers! The sorbet was served as an appetizer (someone's family tradition) . The stories were told! One man told of how this was the first Thanksgiving dinner he had had in five years that he didn't have to eat out of a dumpster. A single mom expressed her gratitude for the adult company. A family in their car who couldn't come in due to a sick child was served in their car. Food was sent home to an elderly lady who was bedridden. And the people of our community realized that yes, we do have people in need in our growing town of Bozeman.

On this Thanksgiving Day our UU Fellowship gave thanks for the warmth we all felt, the friendships that were made and for the memories we will all have for years to come. An intergenerational experienced was had and yes, the children did make a difference!