Circles of Hope Circles of Peace
Participant’s Workbook

Families Against Violence Advocacy Network
Institute for Peace and Justice, 1998
Review by Pat Hoertdoerfer
Children, Family, and Intergenerational Programs Director, UUA
Boston, MA

This workbook is for families at home, participants in RE classrooms, members of YRUU groups, and participants in covenant groups/small group ministry groups to gain further understanding and practice with the Family / Classroom / Youth Group / Congregation Pledge of Nonviolence. The Circle of Hope process is an open-ended process directed by participants in each group. The workbook contains themes and resources to help in structuring the process. There are three sections in this workbook:

Section one provides an opportunity to reflect on each component of the Family Pledge of Nonviolence. In focusing on issues of violence, many circles/groups will choose to use the pledge and these questions for their discussion. A group could use one component of the pledge at each group meeting. Reflection questions may be completed before the group meeting, but they can also be completed as part of the meeting itself. Some sample questions are:

I pledge to respect self and others.
One experience I’ve had when someone truly respected me was ____________.
How do others know when I respect them?
What could I do when I hear or see a person acting disrespectfully toward another?
I will respect myself by ______________________________________.
I will respect others by ________________________________________.

Section two helps in planning and organizing the three different parts of each Circle meeting – social support, education for action, and organizing for change. There are worksheets to record the decisions of the group.

Section three offers space for recording the feelings, insights, ideas, etc., that come to you during the process. Sometimes your awareness of these will increase what you learn and contribute to the success of the Circle. You may want to keep them as personal reflections or share some of them with the group.

Finally, you are asked to reflect on key words such as violence, root causes, power, peace-making, peace-seeking, social justice and describe your understandings of these words. You are invited to do this reflection three different times – at the beginning, half way through the process, and at the end.

To order this helpful resource contact Families Against Violence Advocacy Network (FAVAN) at
314-533-4445, ppjn@aol.com, or www.ipj-ppj.org

Family Pledge of Nonviolence

Making peace must start within ourselves and in our family. Each of us, members of the ________________________ family, commit ourselves as best we can to becoming nonviolent and peaceable people.

To Respect Self and Others
To respect myself, to affirm others and to avoid uncaring criticism,
hateful words, physical attacks, and self-destructive behavior.

To Communicate Better
To share my feelings honestly, to look for safe ways to express my anger,
and to work at solving problems peacefully.

To Listen
To listen carefully to others, especially to those who disagree with me,
and to consider others' feelings and needs rather than insist on having my own way.

To Forgive
To apologize and make amends when I have hurt another,
to forgive others, and to keep from holding grudges.

To Respect Nature
To treat the environment and all living things,
including our pets, with respect and care.

To Play Creatively
To select entertainment and toys that support our family's values and to
avoid entertainment that makes violence look exciting, funny, or acceptable.

To Be Courageous
To challenge violence in all its forms whenever I encounter it, whether at home,
at school, at work, or in the community, and to stand with others
who are treated unfairly.

This is our pledge. These are our goals. We will check ourselves on what we have pledged once a month on ____________________ for the next twelve months so that we can help each other become more peaceable people.

Eliminating violence, one family at a time, starting with our own.

Families Against Violence Advocacy Network
c/o Institute for Peace and Justice, 4144 Lindell Blvd. #408, St. Louis, MO 63108
Phone: (314) 533-4445 – Fax: (314) 715-6455
Email: ipj@ipj-ppj.org, Web site: www.ipj-ppj.org