Remarks of Amy Domini

Wedding of Hillary and Julie Goodridge
May 17, 2004
Eliot Hall – Unitarian Universalist Association Headquarters

My name is Amy Domini and I am here today because I both introduced Hillary and Julie to each other and played a sort of a facilitating role during the early, somewhat uneven portion of their courtship.

It began when Julie and I were stock brokers in Cambridge. She was fun, and we shared a belief that finance, that juggernaut we were a part of, was shaping the world. Further, we shared a belief that while this was inevitable, it was not a good thing. There was clearly only one solution. It was up to us to infiltrate Wall Street and force it to do our bidding.

I knew someone else in the moving mountains business and wanted to get her involved, Hillary Smith at Haymarket People's Fund.

Now while Julie was a friendly sort, delighted with my every suggestion, Hillary was a different matter altogether. Although I kept telling Hillary that Julie was the real deal, that she should meet her, Hillary was not at all sure that my recommendation meant a darned thing. And why is Amy introducing me to someone dressed for a Junior League Meeting?

Next it dawns on me that Julie has this thing for Hillary. I mean this real thing. Now it was let's plan a conference or a party or a lunch,…and let's invite Hillary. So now I had a new role. The safety. Hillary would come because I was there to keep it clean.

But, gentle audience, I am afraid I failed at my duties. The dark moment came when Hillary was giving Julie and me rides home. There was this sort of mood in the car, a kind of electricity. I decided to help out with a bit of an explanation. “Hillary,” I said, “did you know that necking with someone is not actually the same thing as getting involved? Really it is just sort of a simple harmless way to pass some time.” I got dropped off. Early.

Well there were ups and downs but I was there. “What? Go home? No, come on, let's dance some more. All night.” Time passed and the magic happened.

Yesterday afternoon I passed the Cambridge City Hall and noticed the TV vans. People were sort of partying on the steps. Everyone looked really happy. I put it together and smiled. At about ten I said good night to my son John, aged 20. He said he was going to finish watching his movie then go check out the big party at City Hall. Cool. This morning the TV crews were still out. Couples, hand in hand, were still walking up and down the steps. There was confetti all over the ground. History unfolding. This is what freedom looks like. This is how justice feels. Wow.

What makes a good marriage? I can only tell you what I read in the pop psych books. Good Chemistry? Check. Shared Values? Check. Strong personal, ethical framework? Check. But here's one the pop psych books never speak of. The right to marry ? Check. Wow, wow, wow.

You know, one of the few great things about aging is seeing how things turn out. You introduce a couple of people, you maybe encourage them a bit, and what happens?

A national crisis. The fault line for the presidential election. The coming of Armageddon.

Julie, Hillary, you two may just blow my mind. You take a little thing like a fix-up and turn it into a court case. You take a little thing like a court case and turn it into a national crisis. You take a little thing like a national crisis and turn it into a celebration. And finally, you take a little thing like a joyful celebration and turn it into nothing less than equality, dignity and righteousness for the millions who will now have the right and the courage to say, “I love you….I do” before God, and each other, in this country.

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