Dealing With a Dilemma We'd All Love to Face

Every congregation hopes for this dilemma—as long as it doesn't get out of hand. A member donates $50,000 to the church, no strings attached. Yet barely has the money changed hands before a disagreement breaks out between those who want to use the money to replace an aging but adequate organ and those who say the money should be used to refurbish the religious education wing.

What's a congregation to do?
"Practice your conflict resolution skills and then consider creating some written guidelines for the process when it next presents itself," says Marcy Bailey-Adams, the UUA's Director of Planned Giving.

"Ideally, the church has completed a long-range plan and has prioritized its funding needs for special projects and programs. In reality, many congregations do not have such a plan. So then what do you do? There is no single right way to do this," she said, "except to devise a process that involves a group of people, not just one or two in making the decision. At some point the entire congregation should be given the opportunity to accept, modify, or reject the suggested use of the gift.

"For instance, an existing committee, or one called to order only in these circumstances, could be given the task of recommending to the congregation (or to its governing board) how the surprise gift might be used. That recommendation would be presented to the membership for a vote.

"Every congregation has its own way of doing things," says Bailey-Adams. "Once you've been around the track deciding how to use a surprise contribution, you will have an idea of the process best suited to your congregation. Write it down as a guide for the next time. But remember that guidelines need to be flexible to adjust to particular situations."

Preparing for the unexpected and unconditional contribution, some congregations have created "opportunity funds" that hold these gifts until the congregation agrees to its next major project. Some have several funds directed to specific purposes, such as capital improvements, social outreach, and permanent endowment. Donors choose among them, if they wish.

Not all gifts are made without conditions. Some donors give explicit instructions as to how their donation is to be used. These gifts can easily divide a congregation, said Carla Kindt, the UUA's Director of Building Programs. Several years ago, she said, an elderly member of a New England congregation decided his church needed a new RE wing and social hall. He donated several hundred thousand dollars, with three conditions—that the church match his gift, break ground within a year and demolish the old classroom building.

The gift and its conditions split the congregation. After several highly emotional meetings and a round of nasty letters, the church leadership decided to not accept the gift with those conditions. The donor gave the money anyway, without conditions, Kindt said, and the new hall was built.

Terry Sweetser, district executive of the Ballou Channing District and presenter of the videotape "Funding The Dream," has helped more than 100 UU congregations as a fundraising consultant. Surprise gifts can be an opportunity for churches to think big, he noted. When someone donated $50,000 to a Massachusetts congregation for preservation of their historic meeting house the church leaders met with the donor. The discussions led to a decision to hold a capital campaign drive.

Sweetser believes that most gifts can be accommodated without a written policy. "If you do have a policy" Sweetser said, "it should be something along the lines of creating an ad hoc committee to assist major donors." If the gift does create conflict, then the key is getting everyone together and working it out.