Traditionally, the population concerned with planned estate and gift planning are heterosexual married couples of persons above sixty years of age. By being open and affirming of other family constellations, Marcy Bailey-Adams explored options for alternative families. She defined "alternative families" as those couples — with or without children — who currently cannot be united in civil marriage, and in particular, same-sex couples.

Bailey-Adams pointed out the painful: federal and most state laws are geared to heterosexual married couples. Careful planning can mitigate against this disparity, using in some cases techniques already established to minimize inheritance and gift taxes. First, she polled the audience for who many had a will. Nearly all did, but with further questions it became clear that very few had reviewed it in recent years. Without a will, the legally unmarried partner in a relationship will have little or no recourse to the estate, and it will be transferred to blood relatives on the basis of state law. Occasional revision — about every three years — is important because of changing tax laws and changing family situations. A properly maintained will can protect the intentions of the deceased person, and his or her surviving partner. She also advised obtaining the services of an attorney. While legal self-help books may take a person far, professional legal help can guard against changes in the law, and can customize documents to the particular needs of a household.

Bailey-Adams advocated simplicity and preparedness in estate planning. A properly witnessed will, documents attesting the free will and mental capacity of the one executing the will, and a ready inventory of property and assets help with probate court.

Alternative families have a variety of options in reducing estate and gift taxes. For instance, each year a person can give another person up to $10,000 without accruing gift tax. Estate and gift taxes (it should be noted) have increasing exemptions, from $675,000 in 2000, leading up to $1 million in 2006 and beyond.

Bailey-Adams glowed with the last part of her presentation. Charitable gift plans, such as those available through the UUA, provide income for a couple, for the surviving partner, and after the death of the second partner, the balance of the growing fund will then go to the UUA, a congregation, or an affiliated or associated organization.

Marcy Bailey-Adams is the Director of Charitable Gift and Estate Planning for the Unitarian Universalist Association.

Reported by Scott Wells; formatted for the web by Kasey Melski.