Recently I had a conversation with someone who has been attending Unitarian Universalist churches for the last few years, but has not yet joined one. While we were talking he mentioned that one reason he left his old Lutheran church was that he was sick and tired of having guilt foisted on him. He went on to say that what he really liked about us, is that we weren't in the guilt business.

I came away from that conversation with a strong feeling of disquietude. Maybe, I thought, a little guilt from not being clear about what I think.

Upon reflection I believe I see what the problem was. I think, in part, we're dealing with a problem in our spiritual language. Poor old "guilt" has been made to do too much work. As we speak of guilt and how it shades our lives, we need to notice how often we're making the term do too much work. There are false feelings of inadequacy that we call guilt. But, there are also legitimate feelings we may have, I suggest, that quite correctly should be called guilt. By rejecting the false feelings of guilt without reflection on what might be legitimate feelings of dis-ease, of discomfort; we may well find ourselves in danger of losing something very important for us on our spiritual quest.

I think I can parse this out by suggesting two terms: guilt and shame. Shame, for the purposes of this discussion, stands for that free-floating sense of not being good enough. And I hope this is the "guilt" my former Lutheran friend meant. Without a doubt this shame is a terrible thing, and it can be crippling for people. It comes from many sources, but it lives within the human heart like a cancer, gnawing at our souls, whispering lies about our intentions, our abilities, our lives.

This shame is, I think, that evil we've encountered in aspects of our childhood religions. And it is something we're quite correct in abandoning. It should be dug up like that fruitless tree that the good rabbi Jesus speaks of and burned root and branch.

On the other hand, what I would call guilt, is the natural feeling we get when we do something wrong. We find that wrong in our exploration of harmony, and our sense of justice. For me that feeling of guilt I feel if I hurt someone inappropriately is my body calling me to notice something, and perhaps to change my behavior. There are hundreds of things we might do or say that genuinely should pull the emotions of guilt out of us. Without such a visceral response we become monsters.

And so I suggest we need some understanding of guilt being like pain, and serving as a warning of something wrong. Of course, like pain, it can spiral out of control and become shame. So, we need to be careful.

But, we need, very much, to be careful at not abandoning those inner and real experiences that unite us within the family of life, within the web of relationships.

So, notice those feelings of guilt. Look close. Is it just shame? Or, perhaps, is it a warning signal?

This noticing is opening the door of liberation, for ourselves and for the many beings.

See you all in church!

James