One day this past month, my work as your ministerial intern and my life as a parent collided, and I was left (at least momentarily) stunned! On that particular day, I was expected to attend a "theological reflection" session at Harvard Divinity School, and as I raced about in the frenzy of my childrens' before-school activities, I pondered what I would reflect upon with the group. Surely some aspect of my internship, I presumed, such as pastoral visits or worship. But then my 6th grade son showed up in the kitchen protesting that he didn't have any jeans to wear and I had about as much theological reflection as I could handle! "Look in your drawer," I suggested, "there's a clean pair there..the one's you like with the zippers and patches." And that's when it all spilled out in fits and starts and with a misery only middle school could induce.

It turns out that a group of kids, led by a classic bully, had been taunting him about his clothes, calling him a "freak" and labelling his trendy baggy jeans "gay pants." Moreover, he was experiencing cruelty and rejection from some former friends, including a girl who has attended UU Sunday School with him for years. What could I say ? With my lioness instincts aroused, I wasn't sure whether to help him plot revenge, teach him to turn the other cheek, or give him some reassurance that bullies only pick on other kids because they're jealous or insecure. I skipped the revenge, but I did point out that he couldn't let homophobic people "define" or intimidate him and that I was especially troubled that a fellow UU was tormenting him in any way. Can't she even remember the First Principle, for Pete's sake?!

Shaken by his wretchedness over the incident, I sent him off into the adolescent jungles with a hug and with a familiar reminder: "You're a great kid. Be kind. Remember who you are." In some ways, that last phrase could have been "Remember who you are as a UU." I'm only hoping he would understand what I meant by that. Because translating our UU Sunday morning experiences in everyday life can be challenging, particularly in a world that isn't always in sync with our liberally religious values.

One of the most innovative and intentional approaches to "walking the talk" as a UU parent that I'm aware of occurred on the first day of school, when one Massachusetts mother decided to write her church's regular weekly benediction onto the sidewalk outside the home she shares with her 10-year-old son. She chalked out one line per concrete square so that he would have to literally walk over the words on his way to the bus stop. "Go out into the world in peace" read the first square; "Have courage," read the second. "Hold onto what is good," read the third, and so on down the sidewalk: "Return to no person evil for evil. Strengthen the fainthearted. Support the weak. Help the suffering. Honor all beings."

If you are a parent and a UU, what words might you be inclined to chalk onto the sidewalk outside your own home? For now, I'm sticking with "Remember who you are," and I'm hoping my son "hears" the UU part in his footsteps.